What is a good man? We have lost the definition of what a good man is as we move farther away from the Bible as a culture. How do our boys become godly men? #raisingboys #raisingboystobemen #tobegentlemen #quotes #challenges #godlymen #futurehusband #scripture #realmen #characteristics

How to Raise a Godly Man in a Crisis Culture

Inside: What is a good man? We have lost the definition of what a good man is as we move farther away from the Bible as a culture. How do our boys become godly men?

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What is a good man? We have lost the definition of what a good man is as we move farther away from the Bible as a culture. How do our boys become godly men? #raisingboys #raisingboystobemen #tobegentlemen #quotes #challenges #godlymen #futurehusband #scripture #realmen #characteristics

Our culture seems to be losing the idea of what it means to be a man. If you Google the definition of what a man is, you’ll soon find yourself going down a rabbit hole of what it used to mean.

Let me stop right here and have you ask yourself this question, “what is a good man?”

Indeed, right now in America, our men are struggling in a few different areas.

Further, it seems to be a “boy/man crisis” going on.

The Current Boy/Men Crisis

To illustrate, in the world of education, more boys/men drop out of high school than girls/women.

For instance, only 40% of recent college graduates have been males.

Additionally, within the family, more homes are made up of absent fathers, and the divorce rate has increased, making the likelihood of these fatherless homes more prevalent.

Furthermore, boys are three times more likely to be labeled with ADHD and are struggling with significant mental health issues.

According to Time Magazine, young men are finding themselves in a masculinity crisis. Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders are voicing their support in what is being called the “Lean Out” generation, composed of young, discouraged, and angry men.

To tell the truth, it’s truly becoming an “it’s every man for himself” mindset.

Let me ask you, how’s that going? As a whole, how’s our nation doing?

I mean, is the idea of manhood as a part of history slowly being toppled?

Are the days gone of strong men?

Biblical Definition of a Man

As I was researching for this post and as the mother of four young boys, I found myself wanting to get back to the roots of the Bible.

As we know, so much of what society is dealing with is a direct result of moving farther away from God, so I wondered if, again, the man crisis is due to this estrangement from the Bible?

When I looked into what God’s word says about manhood, the terms selflessness and sacrifice became forefront in my mind.

What is your definition of a godly man? Who is your role model?#raisinggodlymen #godlymen Click To Tweet

By way of contrast, it’s the polar opposite of what our men are learning today in the “every man for himself” mindset!

In all honesty, Jesus was my first role model when I went into God’s Word.

I know you might be thinking, of course, Jesus was the ultimate man, and he was perfect. How can you use Him as an example of a godly man?

Jesus lived His whole life thinking of others.

Jesus lived His whole life thinking of others. Example of godly man #rolemodel #godlyman Click To Tweet

He practiced the Golden Rule of loving others more than Himself. He sacrificed his life for all of us so that we won’t endure what is the consequences of our sin.

Can you think of another Biblical example?

Current Day Example of a Good Man

With the intention of showcasing a “Good Man” in culture, I spent some time trying to come up with someone. Honestly, I didn’t get too far… there aren’t many who are the role models for our young men.

That being the case, I got fixated on the 4th Battalion of the 3rd United States Infantry Regiment also known as “The Old Guard.” These soldiers guard the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Arlington National Cemetery in Virginia.

Let preface these soldiers in saying that this Battalion has some women in the Regiment.

What I learned about these soldiers can parallel what we need to be teaching our boys as they turn into men.

  • It’s an honor to be a part of this Battalion.
  • The training is hard and for the initial training, they work 12+ work days plus homework.
  • The physical appearance must be spot-on with 2 minor infractions and no major ones (a minor one is when the uniform is 1/64” out of place).
  • Their knowledge of the cemetery needs to be stellar.
  • When performing, they need to get it right without fail.
  • These soldiers work in all forms of weather and at night.

So are you wondering how this has anything to do with the raising of our boys?

Becoming a Biblical Man

First, it’s a blessing that God has created males. When you think about it, God doesn’t do things in a half-mannered state. He has a rhyme and reason for all that He has created.

We need our men in society!

To become a Biblical man requires extra work and dedication as moms and as our boys grow and develop for themselves. They won’t just become godly men without more hard work.

To become a Biblical man requires extra work and dedication as moms and as our boys grow and develop for themselves. #raisinggodlymen #godlymen Click To Tweet

Second, the outward appearance of our men, the way they interact with others, their reputations, and how they love is all visible.

Finally, in order to become the man God wants them to be, they need to have knowledge about God’s word so they can survive through the dark of times and the weather of life.

7 Truths for Our Boys Becoming Men

  1. Your heart matters more than what you acquire. You can have worldly success and fortune and be unhappy and lonely. God looks at the heart!
  2. The attitude you have determines your life. Jim Rohn says it best, “The same wind blows on us all, the winds of disaster, opportunity, and change. Therefore, it is not the blowing of the wind, but the setting of the sails that will determine our direction in life.”
  3. Passion is what drives your success. As Christians, loving and serving others and sharing God’s word… those things that make us passionate can help us find success. What is your definition of success? Remember, God’s idea is different.
  4. You can change; you’re never stuck. Defeat and failure are part of your journey to growth.
  5. Humility matters a whole lot. Controlling emotions and what comes out of the mouth influence your life and those around us. Everyone needs God, the best life can’t happen apart from Him.
  6. You can overcome anything with God’s help. Asking God for help and doing your part of self-discipline can get you where you want to be.
  7. Everything you are, what you d,o and what you want to become is all for God’s glory. It’s interwoven together. As you cling to God, you bring Him glory.

(Micah 6:8, NLT).

No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good,
    and this is what he requires of you:
to do what is right, to love mercy,
    and to walk humbly with your God.

King David: a Godly Man

With the Godly man in mind, King David in the Bible was a proponent of these truths listed above.

Even though he became a wealthy King, he couldn’t do anything without the help of God. During the valleys of life, he clung to God.

For instance, when adultery shadowed his thinking, he asked for forgiveness and overcame.

Moreover, David remained humble by not taking over the throne even when he could have.

Forward Thinking As We Raise Our Men

While role models for our young men might be few and far in between, when we look into the Bible, we can see many examples of how boys become men.

In order to raise our boys to be the godly men our society needs, we need to be clinging to God’s word and the examples He has given us in there.

The truth remains, as we raise our boys to become godly, good men, let us remember that only with God’s help can we guide our kids to become who He wants them to be.

Might we encourage our kids to “lean in” through selflessness and sacrifice to help others around them? “To do what is right, to love mercy,
    and to walk humbly with your God.”

To read more about raising boys:

The Best Lesson In Grace: Raising Boys And Dirty Socks

To My Sons: Marriage Is Absolutely Worth Your Wait

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  1. This is excellent, Julie!! As a wife and a mom and stepmom of two boys (and also two girls), I really appreciated the tips. THANK YOU! We need Godly men.

  2. Julie, this is fabulous. As the mother of two teenaged boy-men, it’s scary sometimes to see all that this culture does to distract them from biblical manhood traits. I really liked your seven truths. I’m praying about how to be more intentional about making sure our sons have these mindsets. Your post is so encouraging!

  3. Hey Julie, I tried to leave a comment, but I’m not sure if it went through. I wanted to tell you how much I appreciate this post! As the mother of two teenage boy-men, there are days when I wonder if I’m doing anything right. And if they will become men after God’s heart. I so appreciated your heart in this post, and your seven truths resonated with me.

  4. We have one son. He is thirty five years old, married and we have one grandson. Raising boys to be Godly men is a life time experience. I am so happy to know God is guiding their future.

  5. This is an excellent post and that list of qualities should be required reading posted in churches across the nation. That list could guide a boy or a man or a young adult, a male of any age.

    Unfortunately, the 1900s was spent sending men off to wars from which they returned damaged and disillusioned. Their sons are now old men who had to raise their own families after being raised by men with undiagnosed PTSD. This was particularly true of those men who went into battle with no faith heritage. Many of them came home and wreaked destruction upon their sons and daughters.

    This is but part of our problem. The other is the emasculation of men by our public culture, where honor is mocked and the smart alec and playboy made out to be the hero. This began in the 1950s and continues.

    Men who are faithful to their families, who respect and value women, who love children, who grow toward wholeness as they recover from their sacrifices and from war, building their lives around faith in Christ and in imitating Jesus – those are the men we need to head up families and to teach our sons how to be men.

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