I Feel so Sad and Lonely this Holiday Season

Inside: As a Christian,  this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven’t we somehow been told this? But what if it’s not, loneliness is common this season.

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Why do the Holidays Make me Sad and Lonely. As a Christian,  this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven't we somehow been told this? But what if it's not.... I feel sad and lonely. #sadness #lonely #HeartBreakHoliday #Christmas

Here we are again. The Holiday season is upon us.

Consequently, do you find yourself sighing or grumbling under your breath?

It seems like it was just Christmas.

I’ve been feeling happier and now this season is here to bring me back down.

Christmas brings up a lot of hard memories and intense feelings, I feel sad and lonely.

I’m Sad and Lonely

As a Christian,  this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven’t we somehow been told this?

But what if it’s not….

The first thing to remember is, I’m not discrediting the wondrous gift of our Savior. His birth came to set us free and give us hope for eternal life.

But the reality is Christmas just plain stinks for many of us. Click To Tweet

The reason I can say this is because last year, my HeartBreak Holiday series was one of readers’ most favorite set of posts. The popularity of these posts tells me these words touched and inspired many.

To demonstrate how popular these posts were, the images of these posts remained popular throughout the year. People were saving these images, and I assume these images are going to be pulled out when the season happened again.

The reality is, people are struggling and are reaching out for something to offer hope especially during the November to January calendar months. Hearts and minds are in need of comfort and love.

Not a Joyous Season

Forty-five percent of people dread the festive season (Psychology Today).

Friends, that’s a considerable number. Almost half of the people dislike the Holidays.  As a result, this time of year has the highest incidence of depression.

The honest truth is, my heart breaks over this, so God has given me a heart for reaching out to the struggling during the Holidays.

Why is this a hard time of year?

  • Seasonal affective disorder.
  • People realize how inadequate their life is.
  • There’s anxiety about the amount of money spent on gifts, decorations, and food, etc.
  • Spending time with family and friends you usually don’t, causes anxiety.
  • Lonely.
  • Memories of loss and loved ones make it hard.

Why do the Holidays Make me Sad and Lonely. As a Christian,  this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven't we somehow been told this? But what if it's not.... I feel sad and lonely. #sadness #lonely #HeartBreakHoliday #Christmas

 Ministering to the Sad and Lonely

Under these circumstances, I want us to reach out to others that are struggling in hard seasons by offering hope and encouragement. We can spur people to seek out others that are fighting this time of year and say, “I see you, hear you and am praying for sweet sister/brother.”

With this in mind, our faces don’t need fake smiles but we can authentically and with validation share about our real feelings, of people living in a fallen world.

We can ask for a hug and an encouraging word.

In other words, I want us to admit struggle and nod in agreement that life is messy. The truth is we all are messy, some can just hide it better. Click To Tweet

Heartbreak Holiday

I’m unmasking the real life of a Christian, admitting life is hard, and pointing out seasons can break us. Truly, some seasons can make us feel like gritting our teeth and holding on to faith a little harder. As a result, these hard times can make us feel like our confidence is faltering and we feel like we aren’t persevering as we should.

The Holidays can be heartbreaking. Click To Tweet

The real hope of this season is Jesus. He came to earth to show us that we are not alone. We matter in our Creator’s eyes. He was willing to die on the cross to save us.

While I can’t take away the wounds and pain from the past, I can offer some tips to help us find some solace during these times. Click To Tweet

10 Tips to Lift Sadness and Loneliness this Season

  • Seek out God and His word.
  • Pray.
  • Exercise- The endorphins when you exercise can help create a better mood.
  • Seek professional help.
  • Avoid what you’ve done in the past that has led to sadness, adopt new patterns and rituals.
  • Journal and write out your feelings.
  • Help and serve others.
  • Pause and reflect on your blessings.
  • Set up boundaries to keep yourself safe.
  • Avoid negative energy.

This year, once again, Unmasking the Mess will share some great writers during Heartbreak Holiday. Each of these writers has a message to help us as the season commences. Notably, each post will offer hope and encouragement to us.

Why do the Holidays Make me Sad and Lonely. As a Christian,  this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven't we somehow been told this? But what if it's not.... I feel sad and lonely. #sadness #lonely #HeartBreakHoliday #Christmas

Dear friend, I am praying for your pain and struggles!

Why do the Holidays Make me Sad and Lonely. As a Christian,  this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven't we somehow been told this? But what if it's not.... I feel sad and lonely. #sadness #lonely #HeartbreakHoliday #Christmas

To read other posts in the Heartbreak Holiday series:
Dysfunctional Disaster Holiday 

It’s the Wonderful Time of the Year

 A Barren Womb at Christmas

Finding Joy in the NICU at Christmas

How to Choose Joy When Deployment Separates Us

Joy In A Hot Christmas Mess

I Feel So Sad And Lonely This Holiday Season

The Empty Seat
 

31 thoughts on “I Feel so Sad and Lonely this Holiday Season

  1. There is so much heartbreak over the holidays as people’s dreams have been dashed by selfishness. We can ask God to heal us inwardly so that we can shine Christ to the people around us during this season.

  2. Your list of reasons why the holidays are difficult are so spot on. In addition, depression also peaks even higher right after the holidays, too, because of disappointment. Hopes and ideals don’t live up to reality and depression creeps in. Your 10 tips are great for preparing for the upcoming season.

  3. I love this list you made. And it even helps those who don’t feel sad, because they can better understand why a friend or family member might feel this way.

  4. As I get older, I have so much less at stake for the holidays. The kids are grown and I don’t have to help heal their memories of their father anymore. This Christmas I am dedicating to my daughter-in-law who lost her mother shortly after Christmas last year. Heartbreak indeed. 🙁

  5. This is such a beautiful post; God bless you. I was thinking the other on how Christmas no longer feels like a wonderful season. It feels like just a season to worry about the money to spend for the festivities. God bless you for this.

  6. I will be sharing this post tomorrow on Facebook! Recently, I’ve lost a loved one and this season has had a lining of sadness that was never there before; it’s bittersweet. But, like you mentioned, we should remind ourselves of Christ’s coming, to be blessed by what we do still have, and to seek help and encouragement from others if we can’t go it alone. Thanks, Julie!

  7. Thanksgiving and Christmas is also a time when families gather around the table .For many ,there do have any family to celebrate with, financial troubles, or empty womb. It can be so devastating during such a time.

    But there is so much contentment in the Lord. Maybe this year instead of wasting lot of money on giving gifts to those who have plenty we must share with the ones who have no family/ donate the money .

    Blessed post.

  8. Julie, such a great topic. I know when I was anticipating family events and extended family gatherings, prayer from others helped pave the way with grace. Prepping the events with prayer for grace and God to do what only He can helped. I sure get the stress from holiday time because I feel uneasy not knowing what to expect from others. When people are unpredictable and undependable that really causes me anxiety. 🤦‍♀️ Thanks for sharing on this topic.

  9. It’s just so ironic that a season that is meant to be synonymous with joy can be the most wretched time for some. I guess the festive atmosphere makes those already going through stuff more miserable. Thank you for offering these tips for lessening the pain.

  10. It is just as important to be real this season, as it is to be happy. Realness touches more people than a fake smile and “Fa la la la la’s”. I really need to be sensitive to this while I’m out-and-about during this season; ever ready for opportunities to bring hope to someone! Thank you for bringing this to light and for sharing such a vulnerable topic! <3

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