Inside: Though God chooses silence for many reasons, looking back, I know why I stopped hearing God’s voice. If God is silent in your life, maybe He is waiting on you.
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Dana is a new friend through Compel Training. She blogs at Mom, Be Well, which is a holistic website with a lot of interesting tidbits. I appreciate her words and story about her faith journey. I hope you will pop over to her site and learn more about her.
Job 2:10a “…Shall we indeed accept good from God, and we shall not accept adversity?…”
Chronic illnesses permeate my existence. Some days I feel overwhelmed and exhausted. Some days I sleep but don’t feel rested. Doctor visits, medical tests, prescriptions and side effects occur daily. Living this struggle creates negative feelings. In the past, all those feelings have been hurled toward God.
I struggled and wanted answers. Why can’t I just be healthy? Has God forgotten about me? Am I being punished? How am I to be a great wife and mom when I’m suffering from a migraine or fatigue? Where is God when everything seems hopeless?
But God was silent.
Maybe God wanted to speak to me. How could I have heard Him when I was so far removed from Him? I blamed God for all my troubles. The only person I should have been angry with was myself.
Angry people aren’t good listeners.
Though God chooses silence for many reasons, looking back, I know why God stopped speaking to me. I didn’t want God to work in my life; I just wanted God to fix it.
God had been making some changes in my life. I was learning to be content (Phil. 4:11-13). Though God had shined His light into my life, I allowed Satan to hide it. Time to make some more changes!
First, I acknowledged that Satan pours those negative thoughts into my head. He likes to share that way. Once I realized I was allowing Satan to use my trials to only make life worse, I took that power back from him. I choose who I listen to, so why am I listening to that jerk!?
Then, I changed the channel! No more listening to the radio station from Hell – FM666 – all negativity, all the time! Instead, I tuned into the Word. Changing the station meant doing another devotion and Bible study so God could speak directly to me. This led me to a Biblical teaching that was for me in that moment.
Did all of that miraculously heal my body that day and get rid of all my troubles? Nope. I’m sick for a reason, even though I don’t entirely know why. But as my rollercoaster continues, the gut-wrenching ride lessens. I’m learning it’s not about me. It’s about the work He is doing in me.
Sure I still ask God some of the same questions. Why am I sick? Where does our money go? Why can’t I be a “super” mom like everyone else? But all of these questions lack a negative tone. I also ask different questions than before. Where is this leading me? What are you trying to teach me? What about me, needs to change?
Rebuking, discipline and change can be difficult. But I desire God’s wisdom, not just a quick fix.
Ask the Right Questions
Maybe your negative emotions lead you to ask the wrong questions with the wrong tone. Or maybe God chooses not to give you all the answers…today.
Consider the following questions:
- Are you willing? Are you holding back an area of your life that creates separation? Do you feel justified in hanging on to it?
- Who has your ear? Is Satan speaking directly to you or through your family and friends? Why are you listening to lies and negativity?
- Are you seeking His Word? Daily receiving God’s Word? Are you open to what He has to say? Do you expect Him to fix the problem or you?
If God is silent in your life, maybe He is waiting on you.
Dana is a wife, homeschool mom to one and saved by unearned Grace. She enjoys studying God’s Word, reading non-fiction, writing, cooking, baking, and grilling. She also loves to learn new things. Her current interests include botanical medicine and the lost art of food culture. God has culminated her interests into holistically healthy life lessons which she shares at mombewell.com. Join the journey!