Inside: Why does God command that marriage is worth the wait for sex? Why should we encourage our boys to stand out and inspire waiting for marriage?
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This post was written to guide moms to begin the conversation with their sons about why waiting for marriage is important to their future marriage relationship!
Girls. I know you might not spend that much time thinking about them right now. But as you get older, they will be on your radar more and more.
First, you might see a cute girl and then you begin liking her.
When she’s around, you find yourself acting out of character. Maybe you flex those muscles and try to appear strong.
Or perhaps you do something daring and try and appear fearless. Regardless of your actions, you want her to notice you.
Second, this girl might start to like you too. You
Maybe you go on a date or you spend time at her house. Your feelings get stronger for this particular person and slowly you begin holding hands and kissing.
Finally, you’re not satisfied with just the hand holding and kissing. Your friends, siblings or even a Google search will give you ideas of doing things beyond just what you’ve been doing.
Your feelings for this girl want you to indulge in what you think will solidify your love.
It’s the natural progression, isn’t it?!? Or is it because everyone tells you to just do it?
What Culture Says (and it’s the opposite of what the Bible says)
Here’s what culture and your friends have been telling you:
- It doesn’t really matter in the great big picture of life.
- No one stays a virgin till their wedding night.
- Use protection.
- Make sure it’s consensual.
- Stay away from pornography.
So at the fork in the road, you decide to give into what everyone else is doing. You believe the lies because there’s a lack of other men standing up declaring the Truth.
Son, your marriage is worth the wait.
(1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, NLT).
3 God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin. 4 Then each of you will control his own body[a] and live in holiness and honor— 5 not in lustful passion like the pagans who do not know God and his ways.
The statistics go along with the lies. By age 21, 85% of men have engaged in sexual intercourse. Although the average age of marriage in the United States is 27 years old for women and 29 years old for men.
The problem is, most men follow the status quo because of:
- Our culture puts purity on the shoulders of women, but not on men.
- Sex is a symbol of manhood, therefore, a man who is a virgin well past the average age of losing their virginity is considered not masculine. (Remember the hit movie, “The 40-year-old Virgin”).
- Men who are virgins are silent so there’s real lack of role models. (click to tweet)
- Culture considers it uncool.
Son, the reason your princess is worth the wait is
You will have to answer to God some day for your immorality and adultery.
Your future wife deserves your patience and love.
When you think of sex before marriage, you might just think of pregnancy or sexually transmitted disease, but you’re missing the biggest deal, God will bless you when you wait for your wedding night.
6 Reasons Why Waiting for Your Princess is Worth it:
- God tells you so in the Bible.
- The act of sex isn’t all there is, God blesses you with a great intimacy between yourself and your wife when you have sex your wedding night. It’s a meeting of not only body, but emotional, mental and spiritual forces.
- Sex won’t fulfill your needs outside of marriage.
- Outside of marriage: sex is not love, sex is lust. Love says I want you for 30 years, sex says I want you until you can’t turn me on any longer.
- Sex before marriage is like taking a test drive. Commitment in marriage makes all the difference.
- Having sex and making love is different.
I know, dear son, you might still think it’s not a huge deal but let me explain something more. Everything in this world will target your marriage. Our world makes it easy to marriage and re-marry like it isn’t a big deal.
Waiting for Marriage to Lose Virginity
Marriage was meant to be stable in the Garden, sin and evil do all they can to break it.
You don’t want to enter it already knowing that by having sex before your marriage you just attacked one of the legs of its stability. The act of sex sets you up against God’s plans for your marriage.
Don’t get me wrong, boy, God does forgive your sins, but your choices become your pain. Going against God’s commands always ends up with frustration and pain.
Here’s what I’m trying to tell you as your mom who loves you. Taking a pledge to wait for your wife is a brave and noble thing. Yes, it’s a God thing, but it’s a pledge to receive God’s blessings
It’s taking a covenant and allowing God to bless your future life in wonderful ways.
Those boys who have taken this pledge are out there. They might not be boisterous and loud, but they are there. These brave men are secretly hoping there are more men out there that want to be blessed in amazing ways someday too.
Dear son, it’s so important to find godly marriage role models who will breathe life into you and your future marriage. You will be most fulfilled when you have a strong relationship with God that extends into your marriage.
So be encouraged in the Lord and be a light to the world that says, “my future princess is worth my wait, my marriage is worth the wait.”
(Hebrews 13:4, NLT).
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.
The Wait: A Powerful Practice for Finding the Love of Your Life and the Life You LoveLady in Waiting: Becoming God’s Best While Waiting for Mr. Right, Expanded EditionWaiting and Dating: A Sensible Guide to a Fulfilling Love RelationshipAre You Waiting forWaiting While Dating: Christian Couples Who Kept God First From Courtship to Marriage