How to Keep the Faith When Life Sucks
Inside: How do you encourage a friend when life sucks? When life is tough, sometimes telling a friend how to walk by faith when life sucks doesn’t work well.
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I have a problem, how do you encourage a friend when life sucks?
She was sitting across the small café table from me, the room was warm and the exposed brick gave the feeling of coziness. The smell of coffee and cinnamon was in the air, the fizzing and spitting from the Expresso machine filled my ears and I could see the steam coming from behind the counter.
I focused on my friend even with the conversations happening in the coffee shop.
The last year had been rough. Anxiety and depression, a miscarriage, a cross-state move and kids who still needed clothes and food every night.
As I listened to her over our caramel lattes, amidst the tears present, I was at a loss for words.
Gaping wounds filled her heart.
This friend was sticking her toe into faith again, though she once went to church, she had left because it hadn’t done anything for her. Now, she was gripping for anything to make sense in her mind about why her life sucks.
Walk by Faith when Life Sucks
As I sat there, full of Bible knowledge and passages, an overwhelming feeling of not knowing what to say hit me. I had gone through a trying season also where I’d question God over and over again for the “whys.”
No significant answers came out of my mouth for my friend. I couldn’t tell her to just believe because that would have fallen on deaf ears.
My heart could grasp hold of my faith during my difficult time, but what words of comfort can we offer to those who have only just considered coming to faith?
I didn’t want to give Christian lip service to her or offer her Bible verses. I somehow wanted to break off my faith and give her a piece to plant into one of the wounds.
Somehow, from my throat, words never came. The tears trickled down from my eyes and my ears listened intently to the pain and brokenness. Support was all I could give that day. But I knew Jesus was there with us both.
We get wrapped up in what to say, but many times what matters is what we do. Share on XTo read the rest follow me to Life Letter Cafe
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Yourbring present listening with your heart and perhaps whispering a word of prayer goes a very long way!
Sometimes words fail and a hug will do us better….
Thanks for your words today.
God bless, Julie
Ifeoma- thank you! Blessing to you also!
Oh shoot! Tablet autocorrect ???
I meant your being present!
Sorry!!!
The past few weeks I have had a friend struggling with some really hard stuff and I too have grappled with what to say, feeling like I didn’t have the right words even though I have the bible knowledge. Thanks for these words of encouragement that being there is enough
Naomi- thank you for stopping!
What a beautiful friend you are indeed. To share in her grief said more than words ever could. Nobody wants to be alone in their sorrow. Your tears said it all. Thank you for the reminder we do not always have to speak.
Thank you, Maree Dee!
Hi Julie! This reminds me of how Job’s friends acted first when they came to visit him after his misfortune. Our presence matters a lot and when the time is right, God gives us the appropriate words to say. Thanks for sharing.
Edith- yes God does, whether He gives us words or closes our mouth to just sit in silence!
commented at Life Letter Cafe, blessed to be your neighbor at the journeysingrace linkup
Thanks, Liz! I appreciate it!
I was there. I was in a difficult situation when life sucked big time. It’s never easy to keep the faith. I guess I’m glad I’m stubborn enough to keep on keeping on. 😀
Thanks for this inspiring sharing.
Lux- I’m glad to hear others struggle with their faith during hard times. I need to be more stubborn and less whiny during these times. Glad you stopped! 🙂
Sometimes the best thing is to be a listening ear and be present with your friend. I’m sure she could tell your heart was hurting for her. I’m glad she was encouraged by your story about Jesus in the Garden. That’s a good point! I’m glad God is always there for us even when He’s silent!
Thanks, Kelly! I’m glad He’s always there too even when I feel He isn’t!
Oh Julie – you are so right – we do get caught up in what to say when in reality most of the times it is what we do and how well we can listen that makes the difference and is what really matters.
So sorry for the lateness in stopping by I was speaking at a retreat this past weekend and I am just now working on getting to my comments from last weeks #TuneInThursday Thank you so much for linking up each week.
Debbie- thanks for stopping by in the midst of busyness 🙂 Finding the perfect words is stressful, but maybe when the words don’t come it’s because God just wants us to be present to someone.
I’ve been in a similar situation with a friend, and I agree, it’s not so much about what we say but being there and offering support. I’m learning that listening can be more powerful than speaking.
Lesley- yes! I’ve heard it before, that’s the reason God gave us 2 ears and only 1 mouth so we’d listen more than we talk!
Julie, I had to giggle when I read your title because this “sucks” is on the banned list of words allowable in our family. Seriously though, our presence and listening ear say so much more of God’s love and faithfulness than words often do. Thanks for this reminder to just be there and let God work quietly.
Crystal- I don’t like it used in our house either. I thought if I used that word it would get more attention because it’s kind of crude.
Thank you for making me smile 🙂
So much hope here, Julie. I often struggle with the right things to say or do. Often I feel there are no words. Just listening and loving. This post is so helpful!
Much love,
Lori
Lori- I struggle too most times 🙂 Thank you for the encouragement!
Sometimes, God works in amazing ways. I have been in this situation before and God truly was there in the midst of my hesitation. Loved the Post.
Matthew- thank you! I agree God never ceases to surprise me!
Many times there is silence in my therapy office. Because there just aren’t words to say for some of the pain and trauma that people are enduring. Allowing a person to cry openly without discomfort or embarrassment is a blessing in and of itself.
We are called to trust God at all times, good or bad. Your post is very insightful!
It can be so hard to know words to say or actions to do for those we love dearly. You were right, tears and listening ears were signs of God’s presence. When His heart breaks, our hearts break (at least they should). Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable with us! <3
I recently had a friend suffer a miscarriage. I could not relate although I did empathize I knew any words I offered would not be appropriate so I did as you did, I just listened and prayed. There are some comforts that are just meant for you, the Holy Spirit, and God
Crystal- what a great friend you are to just listen and pray!
Being there is sometimes the best thing we can do.
Kristi- yes, you’re right!
Sometimes there is nothing for us to say, but simply being present is what matters most.
Going that extra mile when your own self weighs you down takes grace to hold onto faith.
Ann- yes it does! Thank you!