The Lie I Believed and the Fear it Created
Inside: What is the meaning of fear? How do we change the lies we’ve always believed? When we replace these lies with God’s truth, our lives change!
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I’m afraid I’m going to be all alone. There I said it.
It sounds stupid, doesn’t it?
When I was a child, I was told I’d be all alone someday. As a result, I have been carrying this truth with me the last 30+ years.
I thought it was the truth, but in reality, it was a lie.
This lie was implanted firmly in my mind, unknown and unseen to me. The lie liked to pop up when bad things were happening and cause anxiety.
- My third son was born with two holes in his heart. POP!
- My husband went to treatment for alcoholism. BAM!
- The birth of my 5th child and many complications surrounding it. KABOOM!
I became needy. Dependent.
Meaning of Fear
Every little disturbance in my life became a repeated theme of somehow it would leave me all by myself.
Thus, my default reaction was to worry, analyze and think the worst outcomes of everything.
My little mind would think somehow worrying would prevent situations from escalating. I could make sure nothing happened or strive and do something for others, so they became dependent on me and needed me around.
I had it all wrong.
Isn’t that how Satan likes to work?
Slowly the lies drip into every crevice. Through watching us and learning our weaknesses, therefore, he can punch us where it counts.
Every punch turns into a defeat. Consequently, we live grasping hold of lies, instead of believing God’s truth.
Isn’t this the meaning of fear?
Worry leaves us beaten, without even laying a hand on us.” ~Kelly Balarie Share on X
Worry is Pointless
Isn’t that how worry works?
We think it’s helping, but rather we become ragged and it starts to strangle us.
Life isn’t fun any longer because we are either in the past where we can recall bad things happening, or we usher ourselves into the future and “what-ifs.”
It’s exhausting because we can’t ever find contentment in the present. We worry our lives away and miss this day.
I don’t want to miss out on my life.
However, I just don’t know how to replace the worry. It fits me and I’m comfortable, for this reason, leaving it behind would mean stepping out of my comfort zone. I’m not good with growth and change, I’m a creature of habit.
Replacing the Lies with God’s Truth
- Realize God’s promise of never leaving me or forgetting about me.
- Reassert my seriousness about change.
- Readiness to change. God waiting for me to want to change.
- Replace the wrong thoughts with rights thoughts with the help of the Holy Spirit.
- Reveal my struggles with others and be accountable for the times I reclaim my old patterns.
- Reflect on God’s ability to change me.
My Problem is Trust
The underlying cornerstone to all of this replacing and exchanging is trusting in God. That’s where my key problem lie. I don’t trust Him to not let me down. People have let me down and I figure God will too.
What if He doesn’t come through?
3 But the Lord is faithful; he will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.
How’s your trust level in Him?
Breaking this Stronghold
I’m laying a lot of my honest feelings on you. I’ve been chained to all of this, but I am asserting this 2017 and beyond will be a time of big changes. New habits and new revelations in my life, God is changing me.
Here’s the thing, what I have been trying isn’t working. I’ve never tried to go full-out to God. It’s so polar opposite of my self-imposed settings.
Trusting God was all I had left when I felt like nothing else was left. It is the only way when things look their worst and disaster waits to strike.” ~Kelly Balarie Share on X
Unlocking the Chains
Could this be the key to unlock the chains holding me? I’m so ready to try something that works!
For more tips and tricks to help you overcome your fear, check out Fear Fighting
About the book, Fear Fighting, Awakening the Courage to Overcome Your Fears:
Author and Speaker, Kelly Balarie didn’t always fight fear – for a large part of her life, she was controlled by it. Yet, in her book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears, with God, Kelly charts a new course. Join Kelly, on the journey to go and grow with Christ’s bravery, the Spirit’s counsel and God’s unending love that squelches fear. This book reads like a love letter from God while offering practical heart-calming prayers, anxiety-reducing tips, and courage-building decrees that will transform your day.
About Kelly Balarie:
Kelly is both a Cheerleader of Faith and a Fighter of Fear. She leans on the power of God, rests on the shoulder of Christ, and discovers how to glow in the dark places of life. Get all Kelly’s blog posts by email or visit her on her blog, Purposeful Faith. You can also find a variety of resources for your fight against fear at http://www.fearfightingbook.com/.
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Thank-you for your transparency. I can definitely relate! A daily infusion of God’s Word and His promises are vital to my fear-fighting. I appreciate your honesty :).
Thank you Susanne!
Go Julie! So often we have to get plain old sick of our sin before we’re willing to do what it takes for healing. I know my worry crosses over into sin often, too, and it’s mistrust of God, and doubt, and useful. Worry doesn’t work. Thanks for your humble transparency- including in defining what it takes to fight fear by really and truly going all-in trusting our Lord!
Thank you Bethany! You’re words are an encouragement!
Amen, Julie, amen!! Honesty is hard when it involves our feelings and I security. You have just brought it into the light where it has no power and is covered by the blood of Christ!! In Jesus name, you are set free. Walk in boldness sister!!
Keep being transparent, we will walk every step of your journey with you!!
Marigold- thank you and I intend to walk more boldly!
Have a great Friday!
Amen to freedom, sweet Julie! Thank you for your transparency.
Carolina- Hugs to you! Thank you for your friendship!
Thanks for sharing your heart here, friend. I have believed lies such as this one too for far too long. Here’s to light-shining in those dark places, sister!!!
Meg- yes! I think exposing the fear is the way to healing!
It’s incredible how I quote “God has not given us the spirit of fear….” out of one side of my mouth yet I share my doubts out the other side. Your post is so real. I have been guilty of the same. Thank you for addressing here in your community of those joining you in unmasking the mess. Praise God that we have weapons that can break down our strongholds. Love you my dear sister.
Calvonia- fear is strong isn’t it! I think about that passage too but then fear seems to win.
Breaking down strongholds this year!
Thank you for your encouragement and friendship!
Julie – Way to go! Just put it right out there, I bet it felt so good to finally say it. I find that once we bring things into the light, the less the enemy has to use against us…. and more truth gets to shine on the situation showing us that it really isn’t something we need to be fearful of. I am so sorry that others spoke those things over you when you were growing…. I am so glad that you shared, becasue now when the lie comes up, then you can just punch it in the face and send it right back where it came from. I am blessed to be your neighbor at #TellHisStory and also #FreshMarketFriday
Debbie- So many thanks to you for this encouragement! I feel blessed to be in such a great community of Christian women!
Julie I found myself nodding while reading this! Thank God for that powerful testimony. You’re so brave to share your story of victory. Thank God!
God bless my sister!
Ifeoma- thank you! I feel like a wimp most days, but I know God is changing me into a warrior!
Trusting God when all else fails – at some point hopefully we’ll learn to trust Him BEFORE all fails! 🙂 Great post! Thanks for stopping by Inspire Me Monday
Thank you Carol! I appreciate it!
This is beautiful….wow…thank you for sharing!
Joy- thanks for stopping and your kind words!
“This lie was implanted firmly in my mind” yes and yes! I am struggle with all of these same exact things. I am a military spouse and have four kiddos, one with a disability, and I have a fear of being alone. But you are right, we all need to replace this lie with God’s truth. Thank you for this post and for the recommended read.
Maryann- Replace those lies over and over with God’s truth and you will find the chains of fear breaking!
Julie, You are such a breath of fresh air. Thanks for your honesty and transparency. I know that God is using your testimonies to help others who have fear deep in their hearts. Love to you.
Amy- thank you for your encouragement and friendship! 🙂
Julie I absolutely love your 6 ways to fight fear with God’s truth. Every single one of them is important and necessary to fight against the lies that have taken root. Kelly’s book is on my ever growing long list of books to read.
Melissa- thank you! Her book is great, I think you will enjoy it!
Thank you for your humility! Sometimes we build up the biggest fears in our mind that snowball into huge burdens and anxieties that we struggle with. Isn’t the devil cunning he takes one statement and turns it around so that we believe this lie and forget the truth! Great reminder of remembering truth! Thanks for sharing this.
Because you are ready to break it, it will be broken if you let God work to help you break it! There is no doubt and I praise God in advance for doing it!
It’s so easy to forget that God has not given us the spirit of fear when life throws curve balls at us! Thank you for sharing. It’s truly inspiring.
Vicky- thank you! I’m trying to stand firm in faith and not let fear overcome me!
That sneaky devil. He creeps in and whispers so softly sometimes we don’t even recognize it. We get used to hearing that lie that it becomes reality! It’s so important for us to be on guard, even to the smallest lie. I hope you were able to finish out 2017 with confidence in knowing you have combatted these lies and are confident in God to be in control! <3
Katie- He really is sneaky. I’ve started to really turn those lies over and learning how to replace them with truth truly makes a difference!