You Can Overcome Loneliness During the Holidays
Inside: As a Christian, this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven’t we somehow been told this? But what if it’s not, loneliness during the Holidays is common this season.
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Here we are again. The Holiday season is upon us.
Consequently, do you find yourself sighing or grumbling under your breath?
It seems like it was just Christmas.
I’ve been feeling happier and now this season is here to bring me back down.
Christmas brings up a lot of hard memories and intense feelings, I feel sad and lonely.
I’m Sad and Lonely
As a Christian, this should be the happiest time of the year. Haven’t we somehow been told this?
But what if it’s not….
The first thing to remember is, I’m not discrediting the wondrous gift of our Savior. His birth came to set us free and give us hope for eternal life.
But the reality is Christmas just plain stinks for many of us. Share on XThe reality is, people are struggling and are reaching out for something to offer hope especially during the November to January calendar months.
Hearts and minds are in need of comfort and love.
Not a Joyous Season
Forty-five percent of people dread the festive season.
Friends, that’s a considerable number. Almost half of the people dislike the Holidays. As a result, this time of year has the highest incidence of depression.
The honest truth is, my heart breaks over this, so God has given me a heart for reaching out to the struggling during the Holidays.
Why is this a hard time of year?
- Seasonal affective disorder.
- People realize how inadequate their life is.
- There’s anxiety about the amount of money spent on gifts, decorations, and food, etc.
- Spending time with family and friends you usually don’t, causes anxiety.
- Lonely.
- Memories of loss and loved ones make it hard.
Ministering to the Sad and Lonely
Under these circumstances, I want us to reach out to others that are struggling in hard seasons by offering hope and encouragement.
We can spur people to seek out others that are fighting this time of year and say, “I see you, hear you and am praying for sweet sister/brother.”
With this in mind, our faces don’t need fake smiles but we can authentically and with validation share about our real feelings, of people living in a fallen world.
We can ask for a hug and an encouraging word.
In other words, I want us to admit struggle and nod in agreement that life is messy. The truth is we all are messy, some can just hide it better.
Heartbreak Holiday
Truly, some seasons can make us feel like gritting our teeth and holding on to faith a little harder.
As a result, these hard times can make us feel like our confidence is faltering and we feel like we aren’t persevering as we should.
The Holidays can be heartbreaking. Share on XThe real hope of this season is Jesus. He came to earth to show us that we are not alone. We matter in our Creator’s eyes. He was willing to die on the cross to save us.
While I can’t take away the wounds and pain from the past, I can offer some tips to help us find some solace during these times.
10 Tips to Lift Sadness and Loneliness this Season
- Seek out God and His word.
- Pray.
- Exercise- The endorphins when you exercise can help create a better mood.
- Seek professional help.
- Avoid what you’ve done in the past that has led to sadness, adopt new patterns and rituals.
- Journal and write out your feelings.
- Help and serve others.
- Pause and reflect on your blessings.
- Set up boundaries to keep yourself safe.
- Avoid negative energy.
Dear friend, I am praying for your pain and struggles!
To read posts in the Heartbreak Holiday series:
Dysfunctional Disaster Holiday
It’s the Wonderful Time of the Year
A Barren Womb at Christmas
Finding Joy in the NICU at Christmas
How to Choose Joy When Deployment Separates Us
Joy In A Hot Christmas Mess
I Feel So Sad And Lonely This Holiday Season
The Empty Seat
Finding God in the Hard Times: Choosing to Trust and Hope When You Can’t See the Way
You’ll Get Through This: Hope and Help for Your Turbulent TimesPrayers for Hard Times: Reflections, Meditations and Inspirations of Hope and ComfortPraying through Hard Times: Finding Strength in God’s PresencePrayer: 100 Powerful Prayers to Keep Your Faith in Hard Times (Prayer, Faith in God, Christian Prayers, Bible)
There is so much heartbreak over the holidays as people’s dreams have been dashed by selfishness. We can ask God to heal us inwardly so that we can shine Christ to the people around us during this season.
Susan- I agree! Shine bright this season!
I’m heading into a very different holiday season. Many of your tips apply just as well to different as it does to difficult, sad and lonely. Thanks!
Aryn- I added you to my prayer list!
Your list of reasons why the holidays are difficult are so spot on. In addition, depression also peaks even higher right after the holidays, too, because of disappointment. Hopes and ideals don’t live up to reality and depression creeps in. Your 10 tips are great for preparing for the upcoming season.
Melissa- thank you so much!
Great tips! Sometimes we get to go beyond prayer and positive thoughts. We get to seek support and set boundaries to keep our self safe and happy.
Cassie- I’m in full agreement with you!
I love this list you made. And it even helps those who don’t feel sad, because they can better understand why a friend or family member might feel this way.
Emily- so glad it will help you support and care for another!
As I get older, I have so much less at stake for the holidays. The kids are grown and I don’t have to help heal their memories of their father anymore. This Christmas I am dedicating to my daughter-in-law who lost her mother shortly after Christmas last year. Heartbreak indeed. 🙁
Alice- praying for your daughter-in-law!
This is such a beautiful post; God bless you. I was thinking the other on how Christmas no longer feels like a wonderful season. It feels like just a season to worry about the money to spend for the festivities. God bless you for this.
Jackie- Thank you, I appreciate it!
I will be sharing this post tomorrow on Facebook! Recently, I’ve lost a loved one and this season has had a lining of sadness that was never there before; it’s bittersweet. But, like you mentioned, we should remind ourselves of Christ’s coming, to be blessed by what we do still have, and to seek help and encouragement from others if we can’t go it alone. Thanks, Julie!
Jess- I’m so sorry for your loss! I pray this Holiday season brings you peace!
Thank you for sharing!
Thanksgiving and Christmas is also a time when families gather around the table .For many ,there do have any family to celebrate with, financial troubles, or empty womb. It can be so devastating during such a time.
But there is so much contentment in the Lord. Maybe this year instead of wasting lot of money on giving gifts to those who have plenty we must share with the ones who have no family/ donate the money .
Blessed post.
Diana- thank you for sharing! I agree with making less of our Christmas, so we can make more for someone else.
Anita- it’s a great reminder for me too. My humanness gets me wrapped up in myself often!
The holidays can be hard for so many people, these are great tips. Thank you
Anne- You are welcome! I hope you found it helpful!
Julie, such a great topic. I know when I was anticipating family events and extended family gatherings, prayer from others helped pave the way with grace. Prepping the events with prayer for grace and God to do what only He can helped. I sure get the stress from holiday time because I feel uneasy not knowing what to expect from others. When people are unpredictable and undependable that really causes me anxiety. ????♀️ Thanks for sharing on this topic.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts here, Gretchen! Great advice using prayer to pave the way!
It’s just so ironic that a season that is meant to be synonymous with joy can be the most wretched time for some. I guess the festive atmosphere makes those already going through stuff more miserable. Thank you for offering these tips for lessening the pain.
It is just as important to be real this season, as it is to be happy. Realness touches more people than a fake smile and “Fa la la la la’s”. I really need to be sensitive to this while I’m out-and-about during this season; ever ready for opportunities to bring hope to someone! Thank you for bringing this to light and for sharing such a vulnerable topic! <3
Helpful, real-world tips, Julie. I know many have a problem this time of year, and it causes me to wonder if Satan isn’t rallying the troops to fight even harder against the Reason for the Season. Whatever he can do to mute the glory of God, right? Glad you posted this one to help us fight back. I’ll be pinning it. 😉
Kristi- You’re probably right about Satan and this time of year!
Amazing blog post. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing. It is something so many people need! Have a blessed advent season.
I appreciate it, Victoria!
Great article…the list of 10 things to do to help through the holidays is right on target!
THanks, Sunshyne!
I enjoyed coming back to this article, Julie. Thanks for digging through the mess of it all and providing clear ways we can look to Christ!
Glad you came back to read it 🙂
I think the older you get, the more nostalgic Christmas becomes. You have more people you miss and memories you can’t recapture. I love your suggestions because it gets people thinking forward and not staying stuck in the past. It’s okay to remember. But it’s also our responsibility to pay it forward. Let’s show the next generation how wonderful Christmas can be and that celebrating Jesus coming to save us is what it’s really all about.
Anneliese- thank you for your wisdom!
You are so right. Christmas can be a really hard, lonely, pressure-filled, stressful season. Thank you for these tips. They helped!
Jessica- thank you!
Great suggestions and very applicable to this time of the year! I think we need more honesty and a greater willingness to be vulnerable with our feelings during this time of the year.
LeRyiah- thank you! Yes, we should be vulnerable, it allows God to work through us!
A much-needed message for today. I was shocked to learn that the numbers of those dreading the holidays are so high. Great tips here to help. God bless!
Nancy- yes, it is shocking isn’t it?!?
I pray we will be on the lookout for those people who might feel sadness at this time of year and any time. I pray we will reach out and show God’s love and compassion to others. Great message.
Amen, Melissa! Yes, looking for those that need extra love during the Christmas season!
These are great suggestions. I think for the support role, it is critical that we lean on the prompting of the Holt Spirit and respond accordingly. Often, people want to drown in their misery, so to speak, even though it may not be healthy or God-honoring. Support for them may only start after nudging from the Spirit. Thank you for your caring heart.
Thank you for your wisdom, Stephen!
Thanks Julie. Changing routines helped me a bunch on the Christmas after the loss of parents. It can be such a difficult time so thanks for the great ideas.
Thanks, Yvonne! Yes, it can be a difficult time!
I wrote more about suicide last year than I care too, far too many, including a pastor. That should not be. Your list is right, why people hurt and for many reasons and the answer is right in front of them. Sometimes, that is even hard to hear, though it is true. Whatever a person’s hurt, His wounds were deeper still. I already post about the 1946 movie, It’s A Wonderful Life, where a suicidal George Bailey gets a chance to see what life would have been like for others without him, and I have an upcoming one also. Hopefully, we can help someone have a Merry Christmas, thanks, Julie.
Rebecca- so many people are without hope! We have an great job to do to lead people to Jesus and the hope He gives!
Yes, the holidays are difficult and full of sadness for many. Thank you for your honesty and ideas. Praying you are pulling out all the joy you can from your holiday season. I would love to see you post on Grace and Truth Christian Link-Up. I am sure this would benefit others.
Maree Dee- thank you!