How To Heal from your Past
Inside: The truth is God has made a new way for me through the wounds of the past. I had to believe He could start the healing with this prayer for healing.
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Today I am sharing at Kelly Balarie’s site, Purposeful Faith. I got to know Kelly by being on her Fear Fighting book launch. I hope you check out her site and her book.
As I sat in the cold metal chair in my Oshkosh B’Gosh overall shorts and red flip-flops, I nonchalantly chewed on my fingernails.
The waiting area was chilly even though outside, you could fry an egg on the sidewalk. I folded my legs under my bottom on the chair and hoped for warmer.
While I waited, thoughts tumbled in my head like the clothes in the dryer.
Worst case scenarios were tugging at my ten-year-old heart. I didn’t comprehend why I was here other than I was naughty and if I didn’t behave, I would live with another family.
My palms began to sweat, my legs became weak, and I thought I might get sick.
Even though, my worst case scenario didn’t happen, in some ways, it already had.
Those who were supposed to love me unconditionally had made it contingent on my behavior. The people I could trust had deceived me.
As a child, I was alone and abandoned although not in the physical sense. I grew up believing I couldn’t trust anyone. I learned to become a people pleaser and I made every attempt to control situations around me. Defective was how I looked at myself.
Right there, I decided God was just like everyone else. If I broke His rules or failed to live up to His standards, He’d eventually figure me out and desert me too.
Start the Healing
Christian Healing: A Practical & Comprehensive GuideChristian Healing
The Essential Guide to Healing
Prayers for Hope and Healing: Seeking God’s Strength as You Face Health Challenges
Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief
The Simplicity of Healing: A Practical Guide to Releasing the Miracle-Power of God’s Word
and that’s the times when we need to be drawing closer to God – not away from Him
Andrea- yes, drawing near to God is always beneficial!
I think a lot of people love with conditions. This isn’t true love, since love ought to be unconditional and not dependent on our performance or lack of performance. I’m so glad God isn’t like that!
Susan- I’m glad he isn’t also!
Thank you for inviting us in to this part of your journey.
Thank you, Elizabeth!
Wow! Thanks for sharing with us from your past. Makes my heart break for you but I am so glad that you found God and know that He is not like that. Thanks for helping others heal.
Amy- thank you! I’m starting to see God weaving my story into something greater!
Fear from the past is one of the enemy’s greatest tools against His people. He doesn’t have to do much, just remind us of our pain and we do the rest. But God….
Arlene- yes! God is the true healer of all our pain and loss!
It is sad but true that some people choose to love on an “only if” basis. It’s painful when they cut us out of their lives, but it hurts my heart for them more because how will they fully ever know the blessing of a relationship that is there when the worst happens.